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Archive for January, 2009

“Freedom” by Run Kid Run

This song has been around for a bit now, but it’s been sticking in my head a lot lately (could be that Air1 is always on at work), and I’ve realized how true it is to my life right now. I’m claiming it at my life theme song for the time being. Here’s some lyrics:

All my chains, I can’t disengage2284821590_ab1a517125
and I don’t believe that I want to
One hand sings Your praise
The other brings me shame
I have selfishness to blame

And I’m singing for freedom
I know I’m not the only one
praying to the One
who can bring me this freedom
I’m ready for a change

Broke down I lay holding my chains
no longer bound but here I stay
I scream Father please, I need rescuing
I need You, and You alone

The truth is, I’m slacking. I seem to have misplaced my Bible since I’ve been back, and now it’s been 2 weeks since I’ve been in the Word. And ironically enough, this is the time I should be in the Word most, because the only way to discern God’s will for my life is to know Him better and the best way to do that is to read His love letters to me! And yet I still sit here instead of grabbing my old Bible off the shelf. Well, I believe that’s my cue… peace.

Categories: Life Tags: , ,

Veil of things to come.

So I just got home from about 6 hours at church: playing bass, worshipping, listening, eating, cleaning, and learning. I love my church, it is so filled of love and service and giving. But during the financial/vision meeting today, I got to thinking about how much our church strives to be like a New Testament church more than anything I’ve ever been a part of in my life. We bathe everything in prayer, spend oodles of time together, and revolve around home meetings and giving of our time and money. I am so proud to be a part of the body, and am always encouraged when I spend time with my church family.

But all this got me thinking even more about the gospel, how Jesus is seen today, and why God gives us the different passions that He does. I used to not have a heart for missions, and would admit it to your face. I was more concerned with relationships here with those I spend time with everyday, and that is how I shared the gospel: discipleship. It used to make me angry when people were so missions minded that they forgot about growing here. All of that changed when I went to the Dominican Republic. I’ve been on a lot of missions trips, but that is the one that God used to change my heart. I still believe wholeheartedly in discipleship and strive to incorporate it into my relationships everyday, but now I realize how much growing and living together includes talking about our separate passions for missions.

God has been so faithful to me since my decision to return here to Lexington. I found a good job doing something I like in less than a week, am enjoying a renewed relationship with my best friend, and am diving headfirst into some goals for the next five months or so. But I have been struggling spiritually with purpose. I am so long-term minded, and I don’t want to waste the time I have being young and out of school and not tied down. I want to see more than what the Southeastern United States has to offer. It doesn’t help that my best friend from camp just drove to California and back, regaling me with tales of all that’s “out there.” God has placed in me a passion for missions, and maybe more than a week or two. I’m talking a year or two. That’s right – little ol’ Ashlyn who loves sitting on her mac wants to spend extensive time where there is no electricity, much less Internet, doing manual labor and planting churches.

But as for now, I’m going to pray. Pray that God continues to grow my passion. Pray that I will remain open to opportunities. And pray for those who are already gone or going: Peggy in Costa Rica, AC in Cambodia, and the gang going to Africa in May: Erin, Paul, Tracy, Josh, Evan, and Kim.

I’m starting to fully realize the truth of the verse incorporated into my new tattoo: For from Him and through Him and to Him are ALL things. To Him be the glory forever and ever. Amen.